


NijiAka Week

by otqps



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2015-09-05
Packaged: 2018-03-20 08:41:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 13,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3643860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/otqps/pseuds/otqps
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>just nijiaka drabbles for the week, the greatest ship week ever to exist c: c: </p><p>(i plan on going back and doing the prompts i didn't pick after the event is over, so, it'll end up being 14 chapters rather than 7, because i just can't resist :c)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Seasons

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so sorry all i ever write is nijiaka sob 
> 
> i don't actually like this first drabble at all but i wanted to get it out anyway so i can do the rest and get to homework but!! wow happy nijiaka week everybody i'm so happy for this ship to get attention ;~; <3
> 
> i did seasons for this one and though i didn't feel like i really knew what i was doing with that, i cannot even imagine nijiaka angst, so...

It’s easier than he had imagined to be in a long distance relationship. Perhaps it has to do with the type of person Akashi is, always busy and impeccably patient if he has to be, but despite how much he misses Nijimura, he doesn’t feel any strain between them. It’s reassuring, of course, that he doesn’t perceive any sort of strain from Nijimura’s side of things, either.

They speak frequently, Akashi had done plenty of research as to the safety of the applications and eventually downloaded an international texting application for Nijimura before he left for America, beseeching -- definitely not demanding -- him to use it frequently.

He has. 

It’s a rather unique experience, Akashi thinks, to be able to experience time in two different places. He gets pictures from Nijimura often, of scenery, of his friends, of his family, and he attaches stories to them, of course, so Akashi is privy to his life in detail. Akashi returns the favor, especially when with the other Generation of Miracles. That isn’t the full extent of their communication by any means, but he likes to see California through Nijimura’s eyes and camera, and knows that Nijimura enjoys still feeling included and involved with their friends. 

Nijimura gets to see pictures of his underclassmen under a tree with a picnic, watching the flowers bloom in spring; Akashi gets to see Nijimura’s siblings running happily along an ocean that looks inviting even in a photo during the summer. Nijimura starts flooding him with pictures of his school in the fall, and Akashi sends him some shots of the ice statues he saw when visiting Murasakibara in the winter. 

It’s easier not to focus on the distance between them when he sees so much of Nijimura’s life, though he does still ache desperately sometimes for the littler things, like simply being able to walk with Nijimura -- not even hold his hand, though he misses that, too. They make it work, though, and despite how slowly time can progress, the change in color of the leaves in pictures, the different type of clothing he sees, and more, makes it feel tangible -- he likes to believe they get closer to seeing each other every day.

Nijimura’s winter break is much longer than his own, and they have plans for Nijimura to visit during then sometime, and Akashi thinks it would be nice to have a proper Christmas date instead of simply over a Skype call, seeing Nijimura open the present Akashi sent him. (He sent gifts for each member of the Nijimura household, of course, and receives Nijimura’s gift, and handmade ones from his siblings, and the most lovely Christmas cards he could imagine in return. It means the world to him.) 

Akashi has every intention to visit as well, perhaps during the summer, and often thinks of how nice it would be to lay out in the sun with intertwined hands and be able to lean over to kiss Nijimura again after so long. He tries not to linger on how much he misses touch of any sort, because that always makes it harder, without a doubt, to be content, but he bears it. 

Time goes by and Akashi gets more and more certain that what he wants, and will probably always want, is to experience the passage of time with Nijimura next to him as well, preferably for a very, very long time.

It takes years before Nijimura messages him on Skype, asking if Akashi is busy, saying a call is absolutely necessary, that they have to talk. He feels a slight bit of nervousness, but he has faith in his boyfriend and his tone still feels more excited than anything, and he is very rarely too busy for Nijimura, so they end up on a video call.

Nijimura looks tired but excited, as it is very early there, and his voice is quick, elated, and his happiness is infectious -- Akashi smiles at his laptop, too. 

It’s remarkable that he loves him as much as he did several years ago, or that he loves him more -- Akashi isn’t quite sure how to measure that, only knows that his feelings have never wavered or waned in the slightest; he couldn’t pinpoint when or how they’d grown stronger though, either. Seeing Nijimura just in a t-shirt shouldn’t provoke so much fondness, he’d think, but it does -- it’s been a privilege to see the boy in front of him age, to have been in so much of his life and to watch him change, and Akashi suddenly, just from his bright eyes, red shirt, and enthusiasm, misses him so terribly that it hurts.

“Guess what? Like, really, please guess, I have no idea how to actually say this without just spitting it out so it’d probably be easier if you could just guess.”

He shakes himself out of distraction, raising an eyebrow and giving a thoughtful hum. “I don’t know if I could.”

Nijimura’s expression goes very flat. “Yeah, right, okay. Says the guy who always talks about practically being able to predict the future. I buy that. Try.” 

He concedes, trying to figure out what could possibly make Nijimura this happy, but also be difficult to express. That rules out a lot of things, since he’s never had a problem letting him know when he succeeded in school or something good happened to his friends or family. 

“I’m not trying to be difficult,” Akashi says, looking apologetic and frowning a little, “but I really don’t think I have a guess to offer.” He’s more okay with that now, too. Time has been good for that, the acceptance that he may not always have an answer, or the right answer, for that matter.

His boyfriend sighs, his shoulders sagging for a second before he recovers his excitement, though seems unable to look directly at Akashi through the screen. His cheeks are red at this point, Akashi notes, which is also interesting, but only baffles him further.

“Okay, well. I, uhh, talked to my parents? And I’m gonna move back to Japan.”

That is actually the last thing Akashi ever would have guessed, because it had seemed so far off in so many ways, and part of him had expected that he might have to move to California instead at some point, but it’s also the greatest news he could have ever received. 

He remembers the last time he’d been able to really spend any sort of extended time with Nijimura, way back in middle school, and thinks about the walks they’d taken in the rain, the snow, the sun, and feels floored for a moment at the idea that that’s attainable again. They could have actual leisure time together again, and it sounds wonderful. So wonderful that all he can really get out is an “oh”.

He feels bad, immediately, because Nijimura looks a little nervous in response as he asks, “what’s that mean?” 

For all Akashi thinks about how great it would be to wake up in the summer with no need for blankets, just wrapped up in Nijimura, and how much he wants to be able to share an umbrella again in the spring, just leaning into each other, he has, admittedly, voiced very little of those dreams. It’s only understandable that because of that, Nijimura doesn’t really know what to make of his response. 

He doesn’t know how to answer Nijimura with something that encompasses all those feelings, but he gives him a smile that’s quite possibly shy and shakes his head, trying to dispel his concern. “It means I miss you terribly, and I feel relieved and overwhelmed by the idea of not having to.”

“Oh,” Nijimura says back, which Akashi almost wants to point out is just plain unfair, but refrains. “Me too,” he says, a little mumbly with embarrassment -- less for the sentiment and more for his prior worry, Akashi would assume. 

They can talk about the particulars later, but Akashi would rather take the time now to admit some hopes to Nijimura now that they’re plausible, and just savor the feeling of being able to share every month, every season, every holiday with Nijimura for as long as they both want, and he’s heard enough “I love you”s to think that’s probably not a short measure of time by any means.

Cleaning for the New Year and suffering through the cold, taking a trip for Golden Week together, visiting his family, there are so suddenly so many possibilities, so many different moments that he can look forward to. 

And more than anything, really, Akashi is just thrilled by the idea of getting to experience the world with Nijimura at his side and see what newness that brings each day.


	2. Fluff

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this sure was almost late because of playing love live phew 
> 
> there's like a one line implication of kasakise and murahimu btw?? if that'll... bother anyone... idk just a heads up i suppose c:

Neither of them are entirely sure how this outing happened, if they’re honest, other than the fact that Akashi is fairly weak to requests from Kuroko and Nijimura is weak to his former underclassmen in general.

A group date at a bowling alley isn’t actually the worst way to spend a Friday night, though. Coordinating a bunch of university students’ schedules and working around part-time job shifts, too, had been a struggle -- so all in all, it’s sort of a feat that it worked out and that warrants savoring it.

Nijimura ends up having a pretty good time, actually, able to catch up with Himuro as well as meet a few new people. He likes Kasamatsu quite a bit, since they have some similar mannerisms, he thinks, and definitely react to Kise in about the same way. He catches Akashi’s eye several times, the other boy smiling at him; Nijimura expects it’s partly out of nothing but the consistent affection Akashi holds for him, but also because he’s happy to see Nijimura amongst everyone again.

He returns that gesture of sweetness by trying to give Akashi an encouraging grin every time he’s engaged with Midorima or Murasakibara. 

The actual bowling is quite the spectacle, honestly. No one’s competitive desire really disappears just because they’re engaging in this out of leisure instead of actual sport. Nijimura and Akashi end up bowling right in succession, and Nijimura’s pleased with that, since it gives him a few good, long moments to settle into their seats and put his arm around Akashi’s shoulders. Sometimes Akashi leans his head against Nijimura’s as they watch, and fail, in the attempt to follow Kuroko’s ball with their eyes -- no one seems to really notice it until it’s already by the pins. Akashi chuckles a little bit, quietly, more a shake of his shoulders than anything else, every time Aomine starts making a fuss over it.

He likes when he comes back from his own turn and Akashi kisses his cheek quickly before he stands up to bowl, usually getting yet another strike -- no one is surprised that bowling, too, seems effortless to him, but by the end of the game it’s getting a little exasperating. Nijimura, truly for the sake of everyone else, ends up creeping up behind Akashi as he’s getting into position and all, and drags his fingers up Akashi’s sides to tickle him just when he wouldn’t expect it.

Everyone present treasures the minute expression of horror on Akashi’s face as he gets a gutter ball.

He clears his throat very subtly, turns, and stares up at Nijimura with his brows slightly furrowed. 

“That was unfair,” he says, but his tone isn’t annoyed in the slightest.

“I know. I’m sorry.” Nijimura knows that isn’t convincing; his lips are quirked up and he wants to laugh, just because Akashi has made great strides in letting himself “lose”, even in tiny ways, but he still looks a little disgruntled and it’s -- cute, more than anything.

“I’m certain you’re not, actually.” 

They walk back to their seats, and Akashi still leans against him and reaches for Nijimura’s hand and gives it a squeeze, despite the unflattering mark on the scoreboard in Akashi’s row now.

Nijimura places a kiss on the top of his head while their friends aren’t looking, apologizing once more in a quieter, more sincere tone, because he doesn’t want to inflict any duress, especially not on a night meant for fun. Akashi shoots him a wry look, and says, with a surprising amount of sarcasm in his tone, “I just can’t believe you would resort to cheating, Shuuzou.” 

It’s a good date, and Akashi still ends up winning, but the best part is the laughs with everyone and the little bit of cuddling they end up sneaking throughout the night.

They manage to snag seats on the train back towards Nijimura’s apartment, where Akashi plans on staying for the night, and, in a rare display of human limits, Akashi ends up falling asleep with his head against the window halfway through the ride. Nijimura hates to wake him, or even try to maneuver him closer, but does so with a gentle shake when they reach the stop before theirs. Akashi looks blearily at him, and seems a little alarmed that he dozed off at all, but has stopped apologizing for something “unsightly” like that, much to Nijimura’s relief.

The walk back the rest of the way is quiet, but Akashi’s thumb is rubbing small circles on the top of Nijimura’s hand and that’s good enough for him. Pajamas are the first order of business, and then Akashi makes himself at home (he might as well be) in the kitchen to fix them some tea while Nijimura smiles at his contacts on his phone, which might be a little sappy, but it’s nice to feel like they’re all okay now, that Teikou doesn’t loom over them so much anymore. 

When Akashi reenters the room, carrying two cups of tea, Nijimura quickly shuts off the screen, not entirely wanting his boyfriend to see him smiling so sappily at nothing more than a list of names, both new and old.

“Couch?” he asks, jerking a thumb in its direction. Akashi nods, settling the cups down on the table in front of it when he reaches it, and actually settles himself on the cushions with his legs curled underneath him and out to the side; he likes to see Akashi relaxing, not holding himself so stiffly. 

They sip their tea slowly, talking intermittently, and Akashi catches himself smiling a little at him mid-sip more than once. 

“You’re very obvious, Shuuzou.” Nijimura doesn’t deny it. 

“You’re very cute.” Which isn’t his fault, it’s Akashi’s. 

Akashi sets down his teacup, staring at Nijimura in return, eyes searching Nijimura’s expression for… something. He wouldn’t hazard a guess. It seems like Akashi finds it, though, as his features slip into a soft, sleepy sort of affectionate gaze; it never fails to bring some pink to Nijimura’s cheeks. 

“I love you.” 

He’s grateful not for the first time that Akashi states it as a fact, that there is no real hesitation behind it, no discomfort. Akashi is an honest person, sometimes too much so, and Nijimura knows from the stories he’s heard that his mother raised him to be an open-hearted individual. There were struggles with that, of course, when Akashi himself was struggling and there weren’t exactly very many people that he could go to and express that care for without it being bittersweet, but Nijimura’s glad that the propensity hasn’t gone away entirely. He’s always known that at his core, Akashi was a good leader not solely because of strategy, but because he was attentive to the people around him, wanted them to succeed, and wanted to help them get there. 

“I love you too.”

They don’t go very often without saying it -- not every hour, of course, but it’s frequent, and no less important each time. Nijimura cares fiercely for people, after all, a product of a close knit family and his tendency not to mince words, so something as important and strong as an “I love you” sometimes gets said unconsciously anyway. 

They put the television on for a bit before heading to bed properly, and Nijimura still takes the time to appreciate every little detail of it -- Akashi bumping into him gently when they brush their teeth, leaning over him in bed to fumble for his phone charger in the dark, Akashi’s lips on his forehead before Nijimura yanks the blankets up. 

It’s strange, to feel so thoroughly, impossibly content, but still have excitement thrumming through him despite that; he understands it, though, even if it feels overwhelming sometimes. He’s just happy with Akashi, happy to have someone he can rely on and be relied upon by in turn; happy to have someone who works so well with him and always has. The excitement stems from knowing that one day, this will be his every day. Akashi will come live with him, or they’ll buy a new place together, and he’ll get this nearly every day, and it hardly even makes him nervous anymore. He just wants that, not enough to be impatient or rush anything, but enough that it makes his stomach flip. 

Nijimura murmurs one more “I love you” to Akashi before kissing him goodnight, meant to be short, soft, but Akashi’s lips chase his for another, something just slightly more drawn out. He thinks this could be his favorite thing, really -- trading sweet, gentle presses of lips back and forth with Akashi in a bed that he already refers to as “theirs” in his head. 

The response, “I love you more”, means Nijimura should argue, but they’re both too tired from an early morning and spending time with friends to go through with that. 

Instead, he only shakes his head as Akashi curls up on his side and sneaks his arms around him to demonstrate just how clearly wrong that is, and pecks Akashi’s cheek quickly.

“Nope.”


	3. Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i didn't want this to be so late but i had to study history for 10 hours straight so that sort of made yesterday difficult!! i'm gonna aim for day 4 to be up before i go to sleep too though, ideally. :>
> 
> oh also a content warning for a very brief mention of medication and some self-consciousness about taking it, but it's nothing bad or dangerous!

Sometimes Nijimura still feels a faint twinge of guilt that Akashi had to meet his mother in an airport. It would have been nicer, really, if they could have taken a bus or something instead of being picked up by her, so that Akashi would have had more time to compose himself and all, but he’d handled it just fine. Nijimura’d never had any doubts that his family would take to Akashi quickly, as he’d talked about him during middle school, too, even if Akashi hadn’t come over to his house or anything. 

So there he’d been, clothes a little rumbled from sitting for so long, looking weary from the duration of the flight, and blatantly (to Nijimura at least) nervous, but managing to introduce himself politely and give her one of his wider smiles. He remembers, quite fondly, the entire drive home being taken up by Akashi and his mom chatting, and how relieved he felt, even if his own relief didn’t hold a candle to Akashi’s. 

That hadn’t exactly lasted the entire trip, unfortunately. He’s not sure how apparent it was to his family, since Akashi’s attitude was totally relaxed while actually in front of them, but it was clear to Nijimura, at least, that in private he was practically freaking out. He can recall the strict neatness of his luggage and how he’d hung up his clothes, slowly, with a sort of tentativeness that made Nijimura frown, like Akashi felt that he was intruding. He remembers Akashi getting a glass of water every night to keep so that he could take his medication in the morning before anyone would see him, despite Nijimura very gently trying to reassure him that no one was going to pry or turn their nose up at him. Despite saying he knew that to be true, the behavior had continued and Nijimura figured that was really as far as he should push for a first visit, and it wasn’t his right to dictate Akashi’s comfort anyway.

It was hard to watch, though, sometimes. They’d gone out to dinner one night at a pretty typical family restaurant, and Nijimura’s father had leaned over to ask, simply, if Akashi knew what he wanted and if he needed help reading the menu. The widening of his eyes had been slight, but Nijimura had seen it even so, that reaction of surprise towards a father who would not only inquire but offer assistance. After they’d gone home, seemingly inexplicably, Nijimura had given his dad an even tighter hug than usual, a difficult feat to actually achieve, grateful that someone was giving Akashi that positive interaction, even if he didn’t know quite how to take it. 

Other times he just seemed awkward and unsure of himself, not exactly uncomfortable, but clearly out of his element. He’d asked Nijimura very seriously the first night since their arrival if they should leave the door open, so as not to give off any inappropriate impressions, and Nijimura had laughed, scooting across the bed to wrap his arms around Akashi’s waist and tug him into his hold rather than stay standing, frowning at the doorway.

“We’re not in middle school, or high school, Sei. I think it’s okay.”

He’s always been pretty sure his parents wouldn’t make assumptions like that, and even if they did, they’d be wrong anyway. There’s not exactly a lot going on that would make a closed door necessary. 

By the end of that first trip, things had lightened up a little, though. Somehow. He has his mother to thank for that, he thinks, for pulling Akashi aside. When they’d finished talking, Akashi had seemed a little dazed, and never asked what his mom said exactly, but he had a feeling. Something about him being welcome, and them being there for him, and Nijimura can easily imagine how floored Akashi might feel from that. He looks just as shocked when Nijimura’s siblings end up calling him “big brother” by the end of the trip, and it had occurred to Nijimura then that he had no idea whether Akashi ever wanted a sibling or not, and whether this was painful for him, or maybe thrilling. 

At the end of a trip that, all things considered, Nijimura felt went really well, Akashi received hugs at the airport from every member of his family, and to Nijimura’s relief, Akashi returned them and made no move to pull away. He’d seemed thoughtful until they were actually on the plane, fairly quiet and distracted whenever Nijimura had spoken to him. Then, once seated, finally, Akashi leaned his head onto Nijimura’s shoulder and voiced an opinion that Nijimura had avoided asking about. He was nervous, of course, and also wanted to avoid pressuring Akashi into having a specific feeling on his family or anything like that, so he just… wasn’t going to ask. But it was relieving without a doubt to have Akashi say it without prompting. 

Still quiet, his voice tinged with something not quite like sadness, he’d said, “they were lovely”, and Nijimura’s concerns had mostly melted away. 

He’d reached for Akashi’s hand, then, threading their fingers together and giving him a reassuring squeeze. 

“They really liked you.” Which was true, his mother and father had approached him during their last few days and smiled so widely at their son that Nijimura had flushed, unable to really meet their eyes. It was still a thousand times more preferable to them disliking Akashi, but frankly, he hadn’t really considered that possible. 

“I liked them, too.” Somehow that had been what made Nijimura the most nervous, whether or not Akashi would find them charming or interesting or whether he’d get irritated with two kids hanging onto his legs the whole time. 

He doesn’t press for any more detail than that, assuming that it’ll come eventually, and Akashi seems a little overwhelmed at the moment, so it’s best not to push. He can wait, really; just knowing he’d had any fun at all is good enough.

Nowadays, that sort of distance and hesitation from Akashi when it comes to his family feels bizarre to really consider. Looking back on it, though it isn’t really that far off in actuality, still seems like forever ago. Now, he comes home to Akashi on the phone with his mother, doing some cleaning or some other idle activity while he chats with her, quite animatedly, really. Nijimura can remember Akashi on Skype calls with his little brother, too, helping him with homework, and Akashi picking out birthday presents with him for his little sister. 

He’d integrated himself, really, which was what made it so remarkable and satisfying for Nijimura. It was a slow process, or at least a subtle one, but not one that ceased to sort of floor him when he was suddenly faced with the reality that one day, at this rate, maybe Akashi really could think of Nijimura’s parents as his own, too. 

The day he finds out that Akashi is now playing shougi online with his dad, he isn’t sure whether to laugh or cry. 

“Are you serious?” he asks, peering over Akashi’s shoulder, trying to get a look at the board on Akashi’s laptop screen. Akashi turns to look at him, eyebrows raised as if he can’t understand why Nijimura has any doubts. “Of course, he’s quite good. I’m happy to keep him company.” 

It doesn’t feel any less overwhelming to hear that, and he just drapes himself over Akashi’s shoulders from behind, with the chair getting in his way a little, but it’s worth it. Akashi tilts his head to the side a little, absently kissing what skin he can reach, somewhere on Nijimura’s upper arm. He’s gazing intently at the screen, still, and Nijimura supposes he’s a bit flattered Akashi’s taking his father so seriously before deciding not to interrupt, sneaking a kiss to Akashi’s cheek before pulling away to work on dinner.

“Oh,” Akashi says, twisting in his chair a little to look at Nijimura before he ducks out the room, “your mother called. She said she’d like to discuss something with you.” 

And that in itself, really, is enough for Nijimura; that he picks up the phone and has fun with them. Whether or not Akashi will ever drop the “your” doesn’t really matter in comparison to that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like this is a good place to note i think they're both ace, which i kind of hinted here, but.


	4. April Fool's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this honestly feels like a disaster but i just want to post it and move on sob

“Any good pranks?” 

“I don’t much care for the holiday, as you know, but it seems like Kuroko had a good time teasing Kagami today. That, along with Kise's numerous, dramatic lies over text message is about the extent of my participation."

They're on a Skype call, their second of the week -- usually they aim for three if time permits, but that isn't always feasible, and it's not like they don't still text, so it isn't the end of the world. It's a fairly mellow call, with Akashi copying the due dates for his assignments into his phone's calendar. Nijimura gets a bit of a kick out of watching him do it, since he goes from looking at his computer screen with a little frown of concentration to staring down at his phone, sometimes darting his eyes back up to check that he has a date right. It’s cute. Most everything Akashi does is cute, though.

“Yeah, I didn’t really fall for anything the kids at school did, either. There were a couple of neat gags online, but.” 

Akashi hums to assure he’s listening, and they fall into silence for a few more minutes, Nijimura shooting a few texts to some classmates and primarily just watching Akashi. He ends up smiling, unknowingly, by the time Akashi looks back up at him properly.

“Some day I’ll be able to trick you somehow, though.” 

Akashi looks openly doubtful at that, but amused nonetheless.

“I don’t think so.” 

“Of course you don’t. I’ll start trying right now.”

He leans back in his chair, folding his arms, giving Nijimura an expectant look. 

“Be my guest.”

Nijimura gives it some thought, not really sure how viable pranking Akashi is to begin with, let alone while on a Skype call with him from across the ocean, but he can’t exactly back down.

“Okay. I definitely don’t love you at all.” He says it with all the matter-of-fact seriousness he can manage, giving Akashi a firm look.

Akashi only looks skeptical in return.

“I thought the goal was to trick me, not to tell very transparent lies.”

“Just go with it.”

With a resigned sigh, Akashi ends up smiling a little, too, just a tiny twitch of his lips upwards. “I’m heartbroken.”

Nijimura drops his stoney expression, giving him a wink instead. “You don’t need to be, see? April Fool’s.”

This is not nearly as funny or sweet to Akashi as it is in Nijimura’s opinion, apparently, as he doesn’t really look all that tickled by it. Nijimura doesn’t know why, though -- there’s nothing wrong with being blatantly silly once in a while and getting to be affectionate at the same time.

“I’m quite relieved, but I can’t say you’re as lucky as I am, here. I’ve already moved on, you see.”

They stare at each other for a moment before Nijimura breaks into what’s probably just flat out classified as giggles, and Akashi chuckles a little under his breath, too. 

“This is so sudden,” Nijimura says, fighting back more laughter, “I don’t know what to say.” 

“You don’t need to, as it’s what my boyfriend seems to consider an April Fool’s joke, though I have my doubts.” 

Nijimura’s lips curl into a pout at that.

“Maybe your boyfriend just wanted to goof around with you and imply some nice things.”

“I don’t think he needs a holiday as an excuse to do either of those things.”

Which is fair, and technically true. It embarrasses him a little, the idea that maybe Akashi thinks this is just very childish. His gaze drifts from Akashi to the side, staring at something off in his room rather than at the camera, and Akashi feels a pang of guilt for it. There’s no real harm in playing along, he supposes, and it’s a chance to say something sweet as a surprise. 

Halfway through trying to formulate something he could say, and subsequently refute for the sake of being cute, he gives up; a rarity from Akashi, really.

“Shuuzou.” 

Nijimura looks up, expression questioning and Akashi’s guilt only increases due to the fact that there’s any sort of embarrassment or sadness in his expression. 

“I tried to think of a lie to tell you, but most everything sounds much too harsh. I’d only rather be honest with you to begin with. So I’m going to wait until it reaches midnight there and then I’m going to remind you of plenty of ‘nice things’ about you and our relationship that I value.” 

There’s a brief second where Nijimura looks taken aback more than anything, before there’s a flicker of fluster, which quickly settles into another fond, fond smile, the kind that makes Akashi’s heart flutter in his chest.

“You don’t need to take it so seriously, y’know.”

He frowns.

“You looked sad.” 

“That happens, Sei.” 

Nijimura is back to laughing at him a little, entirely out of the enamored feeling he knows they both share, but even so. The only counter to this, in Akashi’s opinion, is to be twice as serious.

“I was under the impression that it was my responsibility to do whatever I could to prevent that, which sometimes may require detailing just how much I love you.” 

This does not have the desired effect; just the opposite, more snickering.

“I really, really hope you’re a little more relaxed at Christmas.” 

Seijuurou Akashi does not huff, but if he did, he would have at this moment. 

“You’ll have to find out, I won’t give you any hints.”

And with that demand of time with Nijimura at Christmas, he goes back to his calendar, and Nijimura goes back to watching him, never not feeling lucky and a little baffled as to how Akashi ended up so endeared to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everything just turns into them being gross anyway idk why i bother


	5. School

It’s not accurate to say that Nijimura is the only good part of Teikou when Akashi recalls it, it’s just that Nijimura is the part of it that’s probably the least tainted by more complicated feelings. When Akashi looks back at his classes, he remembers stress from his father; when he looks back at the other Generation of Miracles, there’s guilt. When he thinks of Nijimura, however, despite the few moments that are more tinged with sadness, overall it just feels… special, maybe.

Maybe that’s a natural way to remember the boy he’s been involved with for years now. 

They hadn’t been very subtle, apparently, about their mutual crushes on each other. Akashi can recall quite easily the numerous times that Kise and Aomine in particular had made faces at him and let out “oooh”s whenever they’d seen he and Nijimura talking one-on-one, and how unbearable lunches had been with his friend group because of the (not ill-intended) teasing. Akashi would later learn from Nijimura, very red-faced and sheepish, that his peers, too, had poked fun at him for doing something as absurdly obvious as appointing a second vice captain. Though Nijimura argued to this day that it was mostly due to Akashi’s aptitude for the position, he also had never outright denied that it was, in part, an excuse to spend time together. Akashi had kissed him quite soundly when that story was finally admitted to, and smiled helplessly at him. 

He’s done a lot of that, actually, over the course of knowing Shuuzou Nijimura. 

From the beginning, it probably should have been mildly suspicious that the captain meetings were, almost always, just the two of them. Of course, Akashi was eager to be involved and do what he could, so perhaps, at the time, he’d considered himself overly willing to meet with Nijimura more than anything. This, too, was revealed to be partly just a mutual excuse to spend time together. More than once they’d ended up staying after school fairly late, and Akashi had quietly texted his driver to please not pick him up that day, as he’d be walking home despite the distance. 

“It’s rather far,” Akashi recalls saying, feeling a little nervous and more than a little embarrassed already.

Nijimura had replied, “that’s cool,” with his hands shoved into his pockets and a tiny smile that made Akashi’s stomach flip. 

He remembers the moment he’d confessed, after a rather grueling practice, with just the two of them cleaning up equipment and taking a seat on the bench to relax and discuss training schedules. Akashi can remember clearing his throat, looking down at their hands, very nearly brushing, and suddenly feeling like the only thing he could say was how much he liked Nijimura. He’d looked up, probably fairly abruptly, cleared his throat and forced himself to meet Nijimura’s eyes.

“I like you very much,” he’d said, and immediately been grateful that he’d gotten it out without stuttering, though he’d been unsuccessful at fighting down a blush. 

Nijimura had, frankly, gaped at him for a moment before a smile had crept onto his features, all goofy with embarrassment, and very quickly darted down to kiss Akashi’s cheek.

“Me too.”

The walk out of school, with hands tentatively being held in the hallway, is one of Akashi’s favorite memories of all. 

He’d thought it then, and still thinks it now, just how much his mother would have enjoyed Nijimura’s personality. He can imagine them getting along with ease, remembering what he can of her soft, but sincere, unrestrained laughter, and how often Nijimura’s temper and openness would have prompted it in her. 

On the day of their first kiss, an unexpectedly chilly day that had had them huddled together some as they walked, Akashi had been ecstatic, of course, but taken a moment or so to lament after the fact that he couldn’t tell his mother. She would have been thrilled for him, he’s certain. 

Eventually, he tells Nijimura’s mother instead, about how her son’s hands had been shaking when he’d leaned down to kiss him, and how they’d both laughed a little out of nerves after. Nijimura gets his hair ruffled for that, and Akashi gets narrowed eyes for not telling the story to make Nijimura look cooler.

He has plenty of things to share with her, though, about Teikou. Parents, even if they know their children very well, still miss some of the aspects that their friends see. So it’s through Akashi that she comes to know how afraid Nijimura was on the plane they took in middle school for a particularly distant away game, and some of their rare, sillier practices, and how Nijimura had been fondly exasperated with them all.

He doesn’t mention many more moments with just the two of them, though. Those are probably best kept to just their memories to look back on.

Akashi wonders if Nijimura thinks on it all as much as he does, actually; he’s never asked. It’s not like it’s overwhelmingly frequent that he reminisces about their middle school days, but he likes to, sometimes. Having Nijimura play shougi with him, sneaking very brief hand squeezes in the gym, their first “date”, if one could qualify getting ice cream after school together as a date… They’re the good parts of a time that soon became more and more stressful for them all. 

Though it’s, apparently, difficult for some to believe, joining the Teikou basketball team had indeed made Akashi nervous. Nijimura had been the first peer who’d ever really given him direction, and the unfamiliarity of having a captain and leader his own age was made doubly confusing by the fact that his smile was distracting, that he was supportive, talkative, and so open. It wasn’t an immediate crush, but it was quick, Akashi knows. He’s not embarrassed of being so smitten then, and he isn’t embarrassed now, either, but he certainly remembers being shocked at finding himself sometimes losing focus in class in favor of looking forward to practice. 

He owes the school very much, despite the negative impacts it had on them all. It gave him the chance to meet the, very likely, love of his life, it granted him wonderful friends, and it provided moments he savors immensely.

One of his favorites happens to be one afternoon, just the two of them in an empty classroom, supposed to be working on some report for the coach, but instead practically dozing off -- even Akashi, for once, had succumbed to the warm sunlight and grueling training, putting his head on his arms and letting his eyes shut, just for a moment. It’d been very quiet, just Nijimura’s breathing and some quiet taps of the buttons on his phone, until Nijimura, too, had placed his head atop his arms on the table. 

More minutes had passed, until Nijimura heaved a sigh, and said, so quietly and with a tone that sounded a little sad, as well as like he was pouting, “I really, really like you”. Feeling endeared, but far too flustered to reply at that exact second, Akashi had hidden his smile in his sleeve and continued to feign sleep. He never actually napped, though Nijimura seemed to have genuinely fallen asleep for a little bit, and after about 20 minutes of relaxing, Akashi had lifted his head and gently shaken Nijimura’s arm to rouse him to finish their task.

After, just before leaving the room, Akashi had leaned up on his toes to press his lips to Nijimura’s for a long, long moment, before pulling back to reply, “I also really, really like you”. 

Years later, it still makes Akashi smile just slightly, secretively.


	6. Hurt/Comfort

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> very, very large content warning for discussion of death of a parent, and illness. basically nijimura's dad situation and akashi's mom situation haha, so please feel free to skip if that'll bother you in the slightest.

Somedays, Akashi comes home and knows, immediately, that something is wrong. More often than not, he knows precisely what that is, as well. He’ll proceed further into their apartment, usually find Nijimura sitting on the couch with a hand in his hair, or sometimes in the kitchen, leaning against the counter; when it’s particularly worrisome, he’s in their bed, phone in hand. Almost always, he’s gotten an email or phone call from his mother about his father’s health. Being in better care, and being able to be at home instead of in the hospital most of the time, is not any promise that he’s in the clear or that his health isn’t still deteriorating. He knows that Nijimura had asked, just as Akashi would have, to be kept up to date on things, as well; no one had been willing to give the option, as young as he was, but Nijimura had the choice, at least, and Akashi is glad for him.

Today, Nijimura is in their bedroom, and Akashi doesn’t waste any time in taking off his jacket (not even bothering to hang it up properly, just draping it over the chair) and crawling into bed with him. He curls up behind Nijimura, sneaking his arms around him and pressing a kiss to his temple. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks, softly, with his hands now interlocked and resting over Nijimura’s stomach.

He’s quiet for a moment, but there’s a minute shake of his head and a mumbled, “not really” before too long. 

“That’s okay.” Akashi knows more than anyone that the details are hard to discuss, that sometimes the very possibility of losing a parent is so overwhelming that explaining why that could even happen feels far too dangerous, like it would solidify it as reality even further. 

Nijimura maneuvers his arms a little to be able to use them and pulls up a game on his phone to distract himself while they lay there. Akashi keeps his chin on Nijimura’s shoulder, watching him play and beat a few of his high scores, just occasionally dropping another kiss to his neck or his cheek. 

He loses track of how long they lay there, not really talking very much at all, until Nijimura eventually puts down his phone and shifts a little to actually be able to see Akashi. 

“How was your day?” 

Akashi smiles at him, trying to be reassuring, since he feels like the last thing Nijimura really needs to do is worry about Akashi at the moment, but he understands the compulsion to anyway. “Just fine, thank you. No need for concern.”

“I’m always concerned,” Nijimura shoots back, eyes narrowed just a little; not in serious anger, Akashi knows, but more in wariness of Akashi trying to brush off someone fretting over him. 

“I know,” he says, as soothingly as he can muster, and unfolds his hands to steal both of Nijimura’s, “but right now I’m much more worried about you and your family, and I’d rather you save your strength and attention for that.” 

There’s not really a lot of ways to argue against that, so Nijimura sighs, moving closer to Akashi and resting his head on Akashi’s chest, listening to the steady thump of his heart. 

Akashi unlaces one of their hands to move it to rest on Nijimura’s arm, rubbing up and down it slowly, trying to coax him into shutting his eyes, perhaps, or at the very least be able to provide some calm. It’s not that he wants to push the topic or anything, but there are still things nagging at Akashi to say, to vocalize for the sake of putting him at ease, but that’s not always effective. He mulls that over for a few moments, eyebrows furrowed with the decision, glancing down to find that Nijimura has, in fact, closed his eyes and looks much more relaxed than he had when Akashi had entered the room, nothing but frowns and stiff shoulders. 

“I hope you remember that I’m very serious about, if you’re concerned something will happen, I want you to say something immediately. Even if we don’t end up both going, I’ll absolutely make sure you get to go and see him.” 

At least in his childhood he’d lived with his mother, and though that had been difficult, too, to see things worsen, it wasn’t as if he hadn’t seen her recently before… 

Nijimura doesn’t have that luxury now, having chosen to move back to Japan, a decision that Akashi knows wasn’t made lightly or without many conflicted feelings. It’s imperative then, in Akashi’s opinion, that he gets to see his father if things do take a turn for the worse; he’ll fund that venture entirely himself if he has to, and he won’t let Nijimura complain about the money at all.

He gets a nod of acknowledgment before Nijimura re-adjusts in his arms, tugging the blankets up in a way that signifies to Akashi he’s planning on napping off some of his worries, which makes sense, and Akashi would rather him get to be unconscious for a bit anyway and not racking his brain over it. He alternates between running his fingers through Nijimura’s hair and rubbing his back, then; he abstains from saying that he loves him, as he knows Nijimura doesn’t feel much like talking, and Akashi knows he’d want to say it back -- he also knows that Akashi’s love is very clear to him in this moment, too, so it isn’t necessarily something he has to remind him of anyway. 

Once he’s dozing, Akashi, very carefully, tugs his own phone out of his pocket to catch up on emails and read the news while he’s being used as a pillow (though he’s not upset about that at all). A bit guilty, he emails Nijimura’s mother before anything else, though. It’s rather brief, just a request that she let him know what he can do, as he’s asked her before, and to let him know if she feels Nijimura should be in California for any reason. It’s not that he thinks Nijimura won’t tell him, but, he’d rather be safe than sorry. 

He signs it with his first name, and for a split second thinks about putting “love,” as the closing statement, because he does love her, and Nijimura’s whole family, very much. He’s scared, too, and would even go so far as to say he has a right to be; he’s not comfortable thinking of them as his own family quite yet, but they get closer and closer to that every day, and Akashi has no desire to lose any of them and stop that progress. So while he’s been strong and composed during the time Nijimura was awake, he allows himself a moment to lean on him, just taking comfort in having Nijimura’s weight in his arms. He ducks his head a bit, bumping it against Nijimura’s very lightly, and exhales slowly, shakily. 

It doesn’t get easier, even after all these years, to think of losing someone, and he can’t really pretend otherwise.


	7. Up To You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhhhhhhhhh this is super duper late ;_; school got terrible etc etc that's a very common but true thing LOL. i really appreciate everyone who has read though, and i still desperately want to finish the other prompts, but it'll be a while still since i'm on vacation. 
> 
> i really really really just wanted to write gross scenarios about choosing to spend their lives together though :') <3

It's not exactly a planned conversation. Akashi is over at his house, the two of them relaxing on his bed after a long practice, the television on, hands loosely intertwined. They're both tired, that's apparent; conversation is minimal and the television isn't really a focus, either. A nap seems wise.

 

Nijimura ruins that plan pretty quickly.

 

"I have to move to California," he blurts, unsure of why. They haven't talked about it yet, obviously, mostly because Nijimura's been too nervous. A few of his third year friends know, but for the most part he's keeping it to himself until the end of the year and the inevitable questions.

 

Akashi deserves to know sooner, probably sooner than this, even.

 

Akashi goes very still, save for the hand that twitches in Nijimura's grasp like he isn't sure whether to let go or not.

 

"Your father?"

 

Of course he'd guess. Nijimura nods, not quite brave enough to face Akashi, but not wanting to look at the television and ignore him, either.

 

"I see. At the end of the term?"

 

Another nod.

 

"Are you upset?"

 

It's a hard question. He wants his dad to get better more than he wants anything, literally. There's nothing he wouldn't sacrifice for the stability and health of his family, including his life here. But at the same time, he's not above feeling like it sucks. He's a kid, after all. No one wants to have to move and lose all their friends -- and a boyfriend now, too.

 

"It's not really about me," he says, instead, knowing full well they both can see it's just deflecting.

 

"It is. Especially when it comes to the topic of us."

 

That's what he'd been afraid of, naturally. It feels unfair to keep Akashi tied down, it seems naive to think they could make it long-distance, and Nijimura is... sure of himself, sure of his feelings, but everyone points out that he'll meet new people. He can't imagine someone with the same appeal as Akashi, charming, clever, dutiful, caring, quiet, firm, downright hilarious when he wants to be... Akashi is exactly the type of companion he didn't know he needed, but even in middle school, it feels right. They work well together.

 

It's silly. It's really silly. Working up this idea of them being that good for each other is what plenty of kids do and it doesn't work out. He knows that, but it doesn't stop him from thinking about it.

 

Late at night, missing Akashi and thinking just how  nice  it would be to have him here and have him  stay . He's allowed to daydream. He's allowed to think about growing up and living with Akashi. It just... maybe wasn't a good idea to foster any attachment to that.

 

"Do you want to break up?" he asks, far too abrupt, cringing at himself.

 

He does look, then, just in time to see Akashi blink -- clearly taken aback.

 

"No. Do you?"

 

Nijimura can breathe, just a little.

 

"No. I just -- it'd be hard."

 

"Yes," Akashi agrees, readily, and finally seems to decide that he'll clasp Nijimura's hand more tightly, "but possible, and more than likely worth it."

 

That's comforting, that Akashi thinks they're worth the trouble. Nijimura does, too.

 

"I don't want you to miss out on anyone because of me." That's true, painful though it is to say. He can't be selfish with Akashi, he doesn't really know how to be. (He doesn't really know how to be at all.)

 

Akashi's thumb strokes over the back of Nijimura's hand, slow and soothing.

 

"I don't see a point in giving up the relationship I already feel satisfied and happy in for the sake of the chance I'd like a different one. If that time comes, it comes, but that could happen if you stayed in Japan as well."

 

He has a point. He really, really does, and it's thrilling, actually.

 

"So. Still a couple."

 

It's not a question in terms of how it's voiced, but Akashi knows. He smiles, squeezing Nijimura's hand.

 

"Yes. That's what I'd like."

 

"Me too," Nijimura says, practically through a sigh. He moves closer, unlocking hands to sneak an arm around Akashi's shoulders, offering his other, free hand instead. Akashi accepts it, shifting into Nijimura's warmth and settling his head in the crook of Nijimura's neck.

 

"It was quicker decision than you anticipated, I take it."

 

Nijimura has to laugh, sheepish, shy.

 

"I was pretty nervous, yeah. I really like you. I didn't want to lose that."

 

Akashi is practically beaming up at him; by his standards, at least.

 

"I also really like you. And I can survive with you being far away, so long as I still have you at all."

 

His heart absolutely skips a beat, and he leans down to press his forehead to Akashi's.

 

"I'll call you all the time. Email you every day," soft, hopeful.

 

"You should feel free, but don't set a precedent. You won't anger me if that doesn't come to pass," a little wry, concerned.

 

"Okay. A lot."

 

Akashi chuckles, just barely.

 

"Please do," he near-whispers, leaning up to kiss Nijimura, who is so suddenly fiercely sure that... they really will be okay.

 

Later, Akashi will work out details -- assuring they can use Skype and Line, making sure to trade addresses for mail, bugging Nijimura for his school schedule, adding in a second clock on his phone to keep track of Nijimura's timezone, too... but for now, it's enough just to acknowledge they don't want to let each other go.

 

-

 

Akashi knows they sometimes avoid certain topics. Usually, those pertaining to his father's influence. He appreciates that, as it allows him much more peace of mind, and he hates to burden Nijimura with his father's nonsense. (He's at a place, finally, where can he recognize it as nonsense -- that progress feels immense.)

 

It bothers him, though, that his father has any sort of stake in their future. Akashi has expectations, succeeding the company and whatnot, and he does plan to fulfill it. He loves many things, but only to a point. The grand total of hobbies he's been able to pursue to a degree where a career could come of it is very few. Professional basketball is simply not going to work, for numerous reasons. That seems dangerous, anyway -- he has a feeling his mother would discourage him from mixing money into the sport that helps him relax.

 

Shougi is an option. It's not necessarily as respectable as his father would like, but, even so. He's not sure that could last, though. The idea of not having a daily commitment, of not having to produce results... is not something Akashi is comfortable with. It feels too lax, and perhaps that's still a sign of how his childhood has affected him, but. He likes the company idea, leading still suits him, and it's work where his charisma and drive will flourish.

 

His father has an image associated with that, though. Nijimura isn't exactly in line with it. Akashi doesn't care, not in the slightest.

 

But they don't talk about it, not even when Akashi comes home looking exhausted, fidgety, and sometimes outright angry -- his father will just have to accept that Akashi is not going to marry anyone but Nijimura, it's non-negotiable.

 

Today is not a day that Akashi has fought with his father, only a day that it's on his mind. He watches Nijimura tug ingredients for dinner from the fridge as he sits at the counter, tablet in hand, reading the news, and doesn't know why he didn't ask sooner.

 

"Shuuzou?"

 

"Hmm?" It's distracted, but Nijimura's tone is somehow always inviting. Akashi loves that about him.

 

"Do you have an interest in marriage?"

 

A bag of carrots and a nearby cup of yogurt hit the floor.

 

"Um," Nijimura says, sounding vaguely alarmed. "What?"

 

"Do you have an interest, or investment, rather, in marriage?"

 

Nijimura shuts the fridge, turning to glance at Akashi -- Akashi looks back. Nijimura is frowning, heavily. He looks suspicious and vaguely upset. That wasn't the goal.

 

"Is this about your dad?"

 

Akashi flinches, just a little.

 

"Tangentially."

 

Nijimura blows out a breath, looking unhappier still.

 

"That's not really what a guy wants to hear when it comes to that sort of question."

 

Akashi softens.

 

"I know. I'm sorry." It's earnest. He hates that his father has any sway, still, even when he's living with the man he loves now.

 

Nijimura deflates, too, coming to sit next to him.

 

"It's not your fault."

 

"I know." Sometimes. It's nice to be reminded.

 

"Did he call you?"

 

Akashi shakes his head.

 

"Okay. Just thinking about it?"

 

He nods this time.

 

Nijimura stays quiet for a few moments, moments that feel agonizingly long.

 

"What do  you want, Sei? I never talk about this because I don't know what's going to cause you the most grief."

 

Akashi doesn't know, either. He just has a suspicion that the life he pictures with Nijimura is worth any sort of hassle.

 

"I want to marry you."

 

It feels remarkably freeing, but terrifying, to say it aloud. His hands are shaking a little, he thinks.

 

Nijimura takes them, tugging them both up to his lips to kiss, and Akashi looks at him, so very, very lucky and in love.

 

"Me too. Only since, like, high school."

 

He's not immune to blushing over Nijimura, even now, it seems.

 

"Well. I understand your decision to stay silent on the matter, but, I have to say I would have liked to have known sooner."

 

Nijimura laughs, kissing his knuckles again.

 

"Yeah, well. Your dad puts enough pressure on you. You didn't need my stake in things to worry about, too."

 

Another example of how unnecessarily selfless Nijimura manages to be.

 

"But I wanted it, and I worried regardless."

 

"Okay. So, next time, I'll tell you."

 

Akashi nods. Nijimura may have been kidding to some degree, but he'd like updates -- Nijimura's allowed to change his mind, after all.

 

They stay quiet for a few, smiling at each other, before Akashi clears his throat.

 

"My father knew that. That someday, somehow, I intended to marry you." It's why contention existed at all.

 

Nijimura laughs, shaking his head with exasperation, giving Akashi's shoulder a shove with his own.

 

"And Kuroko, Midorima, Murasakibara, Momoi, etcetera, all knew too, right? Everybody but me?"

 

"Yes," Akashi says dryly, not serious at all. "No, but they likely suspected."

 

He leans in like he has a secret, pecking Akashi's cheek.

 

"I kinda did, too."

 

Akashi steals his hands away, stands, and coaxes Nijimura out of his chair, too. He tugs him to the coach, deciding dinner can wait in favor of having Nijimura laying next to him.

 

They settle, arms tight around each other, and Akashi nuzzles Nijimura's neck, relieved and just downright  happy .

 

"That wasn't a proposal, though, in case that wasn't clear. Only a sensible, adult discussion on our standing. I'll still surprise you by asking."

 

He gets his hair ruffled and a loud snort of amusement.

 

"Oh,  you're gonna propose, huh? I dunno about that. I've spent a lot of days looking at you and thinking, 'wow, I want him to be my husband', I might finally get impatient now that I know you'd say yes."

 

Akashi smiles, presses his upturned lips into Nijimura's collarbone, and hums, thoughtful.

"You act like I don't do the same. And I'm quite competitive, you know."

 

Nijimura squeezes him in a hug, brief, but tight.

 

"But not unbeatable."

 

Akashi squeezes him back.

 

"No," and at this point, that really feels okay.

 

-

 

"Do you want kids?"

 

There's no prompting to it, not really. Nijimura has his head in Akashi's lap, both of them laying in their bed, Akashi with a book in one hand, the other fussing with Nijimura's hair. His eyes are shut, listening to Akashi turn pages, but he can't shake the thought.

 

Marriage is one thing, and they're on the same page there, but this is another, and Nijimura... kind of expects they'll differ here. He's a fairly family-oriented person, and the idea of raising his own children makes him smile -- he's helped plenty with his younger siblings, and truth be told, there's part of him that misses the Teikou captaincy even now simply because he had the chance to guide people younger than him. He likes to nurture, and it's not that Akashi doesn't! It's just that asking Akashi to be captain is very different from asking Akashi to be a father.

Even with his closeness with Nijimura's family now, even with Akashi calling his parents "mother" and "father" (something that still makes Nijimura's stomach flip), it isn't like he's had an incredibly positive parental experience. His mother, certainly, but Nijimura doesn't know if that makes up for everything his father wrought when it comes to this.

 

He doesn't think Akashi is like that, though. Maybe,  maybe , at one point, but he's happier, now, better at making mistakes and being gentle with himself. He's aware that his childhood was unfair, that it was too much -- Nijimura has a hard time trying to imagine him inflicting that on another person, let alone his own children.

 

So.

 

Maybe it's worth asking. He did say he'd be honest about what he wanted next time, after all.

Akashi's book snaps shut; it's paperback, so it's not too jarring, but it's a little unnerving even so. The hand in Nijimura's hair hasn't stopped its movements, though; a good sign.

 

"I don't know," he says, with a voice much quieter than usual -- he only sounds sad, not angry.

 

Nijimura is quick to respond, "that's okay," because it is, "you don't have to," because he doesn't, not right now.

 

A pause, one which Nijimura makes no effort to disrupt. It's clear Akashi is considering things, and that's fair. It is sort of a big topic, brought up with no preamble. That's a pattern for them at this point, though, and Nijimura's a little fond.

 

"You do."

 

"Probably. It sounds nice. I can't say for sure, but, y'know. It's not like I'd leave you if you don't, though."

 

Akashi "hmm"s, not sure how much stock to put in that. It's no insult to Nijimura, but priorities do change.

 

Nijimura keeps going.

 

"No, don't 'hmm' me. A big part of it is wanting to be a parent with  you ."

 

That's not something Akashi has ever been anticipating hearing, exactly. He's still a little loath to express doubt, but both his curiosity and insecurity get the best of him.

 

"Why?"

 

"Why does anyone wanna have kids with another person? Because I love you and I think we'd be good at it? Because I think we'd both find it really incredible even if it was scary, and we'd be a team there, too. Because I like to take care of people and I've always liked doing that  with you. I dunno."

 

Akashi ducks his head to kiss the top of Nijimura's, feeling indescribably warm. What incredibly overwhelming sentiments, only more so because he knows Nijimura means every word.

 

"How many?" There aren't any words that would match Nijimura's declaration, so he only probes further, wondering how extensively Nijimura's planned.

 

"Two? Two seems nice."

 

Akashi runs a hand up and down his arm, smiling almost despite himself. He's not trying to resist it, but the conversation isn't all that comfortable for him.

 

"A middle ground in the numbers between our families, yes."

 

"Yeah, not as boring as only raising one, but not as loud as three. Seems good."

 

They both chuckle, just a little, but Akashi soon reverts back to a frown. This isn't something he can readily agree to. Marriage was easy, he knew he was capable of being a faithful, attentive spouse without any trouble. A father... is a very different and frightening amount of responsibility.

 

Nijimura decides to be brave, given he knows exactly what sort of concerns are on Akashi's mind, and simply wants to stamp them out now.

 

"I don't think you'd push them like your dad did. I wouldn't let you, either -- you know I'm really good at telling you you're wrong. But I think you'd be fine. I mean, yeah, I bet you'd start them in on an instrument, another language, all that, when they were pretty young, but that's not bad. Just, moderation. You know how to do that. Your dad didn't. Uh. Doesn't, sorry."

 

It does make Akashi calm down, hearing that. He isn't his father, that's very true, and he does have Nijimura. But his father had his mother, and things still turned out like they did. He's still nervous about what could happen there, whether or not he'd maintain that moderation in the face of a tragedy like his own father dealt with. There's a limit to how far he can consider the future, though, and that certainly extends past it.

 

He tries to consider things under the assumption that he really could live up to what Nijimura thinks he's capable of here. It's a little difficult for Akashi to really imagine, but the... cliche sort of scenarios, tucking in children, helping them get off to school in the morning, doing homework with them... Those seem nice. He and Nijimura will never have any staff in their home, they'll be forced to, but do so gladly he assumes, be hands-on.

 

It's startling how different he thinks his own life could have been if his father had reached out a hand to him. It doesn't seem hard. That provokes the familiar jolt of resentment he feels often as of late, but also comes as a relief. Akashi can listen, Akashi knows how to support someone; a child is different, developmentally, but.. it feels a little less daunting.

 

"I think I could want that." It's not meant to be a non-answer, but Akashi has faith that Nijimura understands he isn't trying to be evasive. Indeed, he rolls over a little to look up at Akashi properly, smile nothing but patient, proud, and Akashi loves him so much it hurts.

 

"Don't stress. You have time to think. And don't just tell me what I want to hear."

 

"Do I ever?" he asks, coy.

 

"Ha-ha. Shut up, this is important."

 

"I know," Akashi replies, placing another kiss to Nijimura's brow, "I'm thinking. It sounds nice. And for what it's worth, I have no doubts you'd make a wonderful father."

 

Nijimura has that confidence in himself already, to some degree, at least, but it means something different to hear Akashi say it. He's hoping to co-parent with him after all, so his opinion has quite a bit of weight.

 

At the end of the day, though, there's virtually nothing he  doesn't want to share or work on with Akashi. He's just gotten lucky enough that every time the question comes up, Akashi feels that way too. He can survive with a "no", here, but he can still  see Akashi thinking about it, even right now.

 

So.

 

Maybe he's a little hopeful.


	8. Angst

It’s not like he hadn’t even anticipated this happening. In fact, some part of Nijimura is kind of astounded it hasn’t happened sooner. He’s not angry, though -- not at all. That’s the worst part of it, really; he can’t be frustrated with Akashi, not when he knows how hard he works, how much he deals with.

So.

He’s not angry that he’s been waiting in front of his laptop for over an hour for his boyfriend to log on to Skype for them to have a call, even though they haven’t managed to in weeks. Akashi is busy, he knows that; his father is a stickler for perfection in everything, Akashi has his schoolwork to prioritize, he’d mentioned he’d felt like he was neglecting Yukimaru, and there’s still basketball to deal with, in addition to his instrument lessons and whatever else his dad has him tied up with.

So, really. It’s okay, and it makes sense, and he doesn’t feel blown off. Nijimura is, for all his temper, a pretty rational guy -- he’s not taking it personally, he knows how much Akashi loves him and how often he forcibly carves time into his schedule to simply be able to smile at Nijimura for an hour or two. He knows that matters to Akashi, too. He’s important, that’s not something he doubts.

It just… sucks, still. That’s really it. He’s just sad.

Nijimura gives up, eventually, but only temporarily, and grabs his phone, heading out into the family room to go sit with his sister who’s curled up on the couch watching cartoons. He’s not paying attention to the television himself, but he drags her into his lap (she goes happily) and wraps his arms around her so he can use his phone. He pulls up he and Akashi’s LINE chat, frowning a little at how many hours it’s been since they’ve spoken, and sends, “are you okay?”

He doesn’t mean to be clingy, but he keeps turning the screen back on to stare at the message, waiting for the “read” notification to pop up alongside it. His mom enters the room after a while, smiles at him, and he smiles back, though he knows it’s weak.

“Did you fight with Seijuurou?” she asks, concern evident -- it’s his own fault for mentioning how excited he was to talk with him again, but Nijimura can’t really help that sort of thing; he’s not the type of guy to hide anything from his family.

“No, I think he got held up, I haven’t heard from him. Probably a school thing.” It’s the weekend, and it’s early there for Akashi, but that doesn’t rule out an extra basketball practice or something like that.

His mom reaches out to card her fingers through his hair, and it doesn’t matter that he’s in high school, it still makes Nijimura feel better. “I’m sorry, I know he’ll turn up, though. That boy’s nothing if not diligent.” He knows she means it, that she’s sorry, and that helps, too.  
  
“I know. I just miss him, and I worry about him.”

His little sister chooses this moment to tilt her head back and look at him, upside down, which brings a more genuine smile to his lips.

“What?” He chuckles a little bit as she shifts around in his lap to look at him properly, her expression serious.

“Sei told me that he worries about you, too, so he asked me to give you a big hug when you looked sad.” She throws her arms around his neck, then, and Nijimura honestly feels a little (a lot) like crying for too many reasons all at once.

He’s caught up in thinking how lucky he is, since his dad is getting healthier by the day, he has siblings who adore him, he has parents who do, too, and support him more than he deserves, probably, given the trouble he used to make -- and a boyfriend who he can’t even begin to describe.

His phone beeps.

His sister slides out of his grasp entirely and trots off to the kitchen to beg for a snack and Nijimura pulls up LINE again, almost nervous. It’s Akashi, of course (finally).

“I’m so sorry,” it reads, “my father decided that breakfast with some colleagues of his was more important than any prior engagement I had scheduled.” Naturally, Nijimura thinks, only a little bitter, he promises. “I’ll be home in half an hour, and I can spend the entire day talking, for however long you can stay up.” He’d be willing to pull an all-nighter for Akashi, easily, so there’s flutters of excitement in his stomach at the prospect of all that time.

“Don’t say sorry,” he sends back, “I just miss you.”

The response is nearly immediate, and it breaks his heart. “I miss you more.”

They trade replies back and forth while Akashi is, presumably, in a car on the way home, and Nijimura wanders back to his room to lay on his bed and wait for Akashi to get on Skype again.

(“You definitely don’t.”

“I do.”

Nijimura’s heart skips a little at that, and he sort of wants to bury his face in his pillow for even going there.

“Nah.”

“Hmm.”)

They argue, in some gross, couple-y fashion that he loves until Akashi logs on and calls Nijimura, who picks up and feels like he just about melts, seeing Akashi in one of his nice dress shirts, still wearing his tie and everything.

“Hi,” he says, knowing it sounds dopey and smitten (because he is).

Akashi frowns at him, which is still a handsome expression on him, but Nijimura would rather he not.

“I’m sorry, again -- I didn’t forget about you, I just didn’t have the opportunity to politely reach for my phone. I think they would have asked. ‘I have to tell my boyfriend in America that I’m going to be late for our Skype date’ is not something my father would have been pleased to hear me say, I’m fairly sure.”

Nijimura tries very hard not to grit his teeth.

“You don’t owe me a bunch of apologies and explanation, Sei. I know you wouldn’t stand me up.”

 _Then_ Akashi grins, almost shy.

“Never by choice, no.”

It’s okay, after that. It’s easy to slip into talking about their friends, explaining what’s been going on at school -- Nijimura’s parents both enter his room on separate occasions, end up waving and chatting with Akashi a little bit, too… It’s just good, relaxed, and what Nijimura really needed.

He curls up under his blankets, keeping his laptop near him even while he settles his head on his pillow and listens to Akashi talk, and it’s effortless to say, “I love you” when Akashi says he looks cute.

“And I love you, too, but please don’t fall asleep during our call, Shuuzou.”

He does.

That’s alright, too, though.


	9. Domestic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy nijiaka day again everyone!! \o/ even though the anime failed our ship, and so have the drama cds and replace novels, please continue to enjoy these sweethearts ;w; don't let nijiaka die! <333

Nijimura pushes the cart with most of his weight, leaning against it as he follows Akashi up and down each aisle. Akashi has a list in hand, his eyebrows furrowed, somehow still so serious and intense about groceries, even after they’ve made this trip plenty of times. 

The list is hung up on their refrigerator, normally, for both of them to be able to scribble down whatever comes to mind. Akashi’s precise writing is a stark contrast to the scrawl of Nijimura’s, which is, in part, due to the fact that he usually just writes against the refrigerator itself instead of pulling it off to write neatly on a table. 

“Were we out of cereal? It’s not written down…” Akashi muses as he walks, which is entertaining, and frightfully endearing. Sometimes Nijimura wants to call his parents and ask them, very seriously, if it’s normal to be so fond of how someone grocery shops -- is that what love does to a person, really? 

Apparently. 

“Might as well get another box, it’ll get eaten.”

He gets a skeptical look in return, but Akashi approaches the shelf anyway and reaches up (he has to _reach_ , how can he not be enamored with all this?) for a box of Nijimura’s favorite and drops it into the cart. 

"Next?" Akashi asks, coming to walk alongside Nijimura. He breaks his lazy pose to reach down and tangle his fingers with Akashi's for just a moment in the empty aisle, and Akashi's small smile makes his stomach flip, still.

They've been living together for a few years now, and he still isn't immune to what feels like falling in love with Akashi all over again in the most random moments.

Akashi's not immune to it either, he knows -- he knows because sometimes he walks in the room and Akashi will be folding clothes or typing away on his laptop and he'll look up and his fingers will stutter to a halt. Sometimes he wakes up in the morning and Akashi is already smiling at him, and at the sight of Nijimura smiling back blearily, he presses his lips to Nijimura's with fierce feeling. It's things like that. He's grateful for a relationship where he knows everything is mutual.

"Uh, just bread and vegetables left."

They make their way around the store, spending far too long inspecting the health of the vegetables they plan on purchasing. Finally, Akashi stops, peering around him, and Nijimura pauses too, looking curiously at him.

"Did we leave something else off?"

"I did, yes. Deliberately. Just a moment."

He's off, then, to some unknown aisle, leaving Nijimura standing alone, feeling a little silly with his cart full of food. He pulls out his phone to check his messages while Akashi does... whatever it is that he's doing, but only a few moments pass before he comes back with a small, colorfully decorated cake in his hands. He places it carefully in the cart, and Nijimura stares at it, incredulous.

"Uh?"

"Let's just pay," Akashi suggests, tugging on Nijimura's elbow until he heads towards the registers with him.

So he does, pulling out his card to do that while Akashi puts their food in their bags -- they always bring their own, Akashi is very environmentally conscious. Nijimura eyes the cake the entire time, though, really stumped as to why it's there. Akashi doesn't exactly buy things like that without purpose.

The walk home is a little quiet before Nijimura bumps his shoulder into Akashi's for his attention. "So... cake?"

Akashi grins at him, but there's a tiny bit of a blush on his cheeks that has Nijimura _very_ curious.

"It's silly. It's the anniversary of when we first kissed. I thought it would be nice."

Nijimura promptly drops one of the bags he's carrying, grateful it's only a box of cereal and some carrots.

"Why did we go grocery shopping on our anniversary?"

Akashi blinks.

"We needed food. It's not like it's our relationship's anniversary, either -- it's much less important."

Nijimura isn't sure about that, but even so.

"We are way too young to be grocery shopping on any sort of anniversary, okay? That's embarrassing. We're in our 20s, Sei, not... 40s."

They'll get there, though, and he's looking forward to it, honestly.

"Let's go out to dinner, then, and stay up irresponsibly late to eat cake in the middle of the night."

Such a suggestion would have probably been unheard of from Akashi years ago, but it's a testament to how much happier he is now that he's out from under his father's thumb, that he can propose something like that. "Silly", he'd called the cake, and no doubt he feels that way about this, too -- but that's a good thing. Akashi needs to be silly, in Nijimura's opinion, at least some of the time. He's glad he can give him an opportunity for it.

When they arrive home, Akashi insists on putting the food away properly before they change into anything a little nicer to go out to a restaurant in, which Nijimura relents to with a sigh. The resulting shuffling around the kitchen together and touches of hands is worth the extra time spent.

Akashi brushes his hands away later, buttoning up his shirt for him, for no apparent reason, and leans up to peck Nijimura on the lips -- probably rewards for being so patient this whole time. "You look very handsome," Akashi says, something warm and proud in his voice, "as always."

Nijimura settles his hands on Akashi's hips to keep him close, moves in to bump his nose against Akashi's affectionately, and kisses him again. "You too."

He's not sure which of them prompts the next kiss, only that it happens, only that before he knows it, Akashi's mouth is slanted against his own, the pace something slow, but thorough -- the type of kiss that leaves him breathless despite it being easy, not asking for anything.

"I don't know what to do with you," he huffs out, chasing Akashi's lips with his own.

The curve of Akashi's mouth is pleased -- and amused. "This is fine," he says, resting his hands on Nijimura's arms, running them up and down.

It's tempting, really -- it's the anniversary of their first kiss, after all, surely there isn't really a better way to spend it than doing just this.

"Dinner", Nijimura insists, planting a few more tiny smooches to Akashi's lips, his cheeks, "then 'this', then cake. Then more of this. Okay?"

He nods, but doesn't fail to note how Nijimura hasn't let go of him just yet.

He wants to blurt out how much he loves Akashi, not for the first time, about how even the way he organizes their home makes him feel like his heart is going to burst, but he can do that later. They'll never stop holding onto each other if he says that all now. So Nijimura steps back, drops his hold on him, only for Akashi to steal his hand again for something more lengthy than in the grocery store earlier.

"I love you too, Shuuzou," he says, all knowing and sincere, "very much."

"Stop that," Nijimura snaps back -- but he threads their fingers together once more and everything is just how he wants it to be.


End file.
